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Dealing with Pet Loss & Grief Counseling

• Denial-the more sudden the death, the more difficult it can be to accept that your pet is gone
• Anger / guilt- these feelings often follow the denial stag. Anger can be directed toward loved ones such as family and friends, or toward your pet's doctors or care givers. People often feel guilty and find themselves blaming others for not recognizing their pet's illness earlier, their pet's poor response to medical therapy, or their inability to afford adequate medical care.
• Anger is a  very common and natural reaction when a pet is injured due to an accident that could have been prevented. Just remember that accidents are unintentional and that the person involved is probably feeling guilty enough already.
• Depression- also a common emotion after a beloved pet has died. This is the period where the greatest sense of loss and abandonment is experienced.  The friend that was always by your side is no longer there and every little thing can seem like a constant reminder of the loss of your pet. This can be the hardest stage & can last for a long period of time.
• Resolution & acceptance- eventually one will come to terms with all of the emotions- denial, guilt, anger, depression, loss, and abandonment and accept the death of one's pet. It is natural to keep missing your pet and many people will continue to have intermittent emotional periods of loss and depression.  However, more times than not, the feelings of loss will eventually be replaced by fond memories of time you shared with your pet.

• Many Veterinary Schools and some large private practices have set up pet loss support hot lines to help grieving owners come to terms with their pet's grave medical condition or the death of their pet.
• Manned by volunteers- students, doctors, and nursing staff.
• Hot line volunteers usually participate in regular training sessions with a licensed therapist and have an advisor whom they can consult with.
• Callers are assured the assistance of an impartial, caring, supportive person whom they may trust to talk about their pets.  
• People who have terminally ill  or critically injured pets are also encouraged to call if they are having difficulty deciding if or when to euthanize their pets for humane reasons.  Knowing when the right time to say good-bye is often more difficult for owners than if their pet dies on their own. 
• Click here for Pet Loss HOT LINE numbers and hours of operation.

• Children have special relationships with animals and grief differently than adults.
• Always try to be honest with your child about the pet's condition- excluding or shielding them from a painful decision or situation will only complicate their grieving.  Children respect straightforward, truthful, and simple answers, and if prepared adequately, they are usually able to accept the loss of their pet. If possible, try to let the child say good-bye to the pet.
• Encourage your child to talk about his / her feelings and allow yourself to do the same. Let your child know that it is ok to feel sad or to cry.
• Many parents find that reading a book that addresses pet loss is very helpful.
• Emphasize the fact that no one is to blame for the death of their pet- even in cases of an accident. Many children can feel that they are somehow responsible and this will complicate the grieving process as well.
• Alert your child's teacher or day care provider about the loss of the family pet.  They can help enormously if they are aware your child is going through a grieving process.
• Click here for a List of Helpful Books especially for children and for adults

• Humane euthanasia is perhaps one of the kindest things you can do for a pet that is terminally ill or critically injured where your pet will never recover to normal health.
• It is time when your pet's quality of life deteriorates to a point where he or she can longer live a normal life- your pet has stopped eating or is vomiting frequently, is too weak to get up  or painful from arthritis to walk, having difficulty moving their bowels or has lost bowel or urine control,  having frequent non-controllable seizures, respiratory distress, or when a pet is afflicted by cancer and is wasting away.
• It is also time when a critically injured pet requires extensive veterinary care and the financial or emotional cost of treatment is beyond the means of the owner.
• Listen to your Veterinarian, they will discuss the condition of you pet, the treatment options available, and a general prognosis.  They may suggest you seek a second opinion of a specialist in complicated cases. They will not tell you what to do, but will often advise a particular path weather treatment or euthanasia based on the severity of the illness or injury and your financial & emotional situation. 
• People who have terminally ill  or critically injured pets are also encouraged to call a pet support Hotline if they are having difficulty deciding if or when to euthanize their pets for humane reasons. 
• Knowing when the right time to say good-bye is often more difficult for owners than if their pet dies on their own.